I just wanna say that I thank Allah for these good whispers in my head, or the good and more rational me that would tell the badder side of me when I'm not being nice, even in the presence of no one else. I really have made it this far, and alhamdulillah for that. Because I remember the old days that when I felt sad or things weren't in my favor, nothing in me would have the power to tell me that "Hey, it's not that bad. It's okay, we still have a lot to be grateful for."

Alhamdulillah for the days now that I could still have it in me to have good things told to me by me when things are not in my favor.

A few nights ago I couldnt help but to jUST bring it to Insta about something. If you really know me, you know I am no longer one who brings personal arguments to social accounts anymore (because I have other private account with very few trusted people for that hehe). But sometimes, we don't bring our personal matters to public because we want to make a big fuss out of something--

we just want to be heard.

I wanted to be heard.
I wanted someone else to hear my stories and not ridicule or belitte me.
I wanted someone to be empathic towards me and realize that other people did me shit.

I swear before I could say the last five words, I thought of it really thoroughly for days if people actually did shit to me. And they fucking did.

Sometimes kan, bila kita terlalu lama in a circle or around people yang tak bagus untuk kita, kita lupa yang our values tak depend on them. Kita lupa yang in this world, there are many other people yang see so much more in us than people who have ill feelings or thoughts towards us.

And I thank one of my best friends that reminded this.