a waiting game in my career journey

Rezeki semua orang sudah tertulis dan apa yang tak ditakdirkan untuk kita, dekat macam mana pun, takkan pernah sampai pada kita. Those who know are aware that I left CapG for SLB's offer even when the pay difference wasn't so much for I believed in a greater career growth potential in the big blue which also had had my heart through my internship experience. It was never a dream I had from the beginning but after months of being a part of it, even if it wasn't in the most significant way, I started to carry the pride of the company and I foresaw myself being a real part of it; welp, more real than just carrying an intern title.

But who would've thought that the global pandemic was about to blow off and after months of putting down my signature on the official contract, I would still be stuck at home and knowing that my opportunity is highly likely to have been blown over already.

For the past few months, I had put in efforts more than I ever thought I would, so strongly believing that my rezeki and all that I pray for will come, I just need to put in the right efforts. My writing here doesn't mean that I have given up-- I haven't but I just pray so so much that I come out of this uncertainty stronger than I had ever been, really soon.

Waiting in an uncertainty is amongst a huge test of faith, really.

Many times I was on the brink of wondering if I had made the wrong choice for jumping back to SLB when I was only a week into CapG but really, would it have been wise to do it differently?

It wasn't a dream from the beginning but it would have become a proud achievement for my own self to be able to work in a firm so highly credible like the big blue and I was already handed that dreamy offer of mine; so how could I, turn it away?

Rezeki semua orang sudah ditetapkan dan mungkin rezeki aku belum tiba masanya lagi tapi aku yakin, dan aku berharap hati aku akan terus yakin..

dengan usaha, pasti ada balasannya.

Please make prayers for me :-(